Say no to the negative
PUBLISHED: 13:45 01 June 2006 | UPDATED: 14:42 12 May 2010
SO how do you stop feeling depressed, stressed, anxious or just downright negative? I ve had a number of people writing in to say that they re looking forward to the exercise I promised last month. Well here it is. And don t knock it because it s simple.
SO how do you stop feeling depressed, stressed, anxious or just downright negative?
I've had a number of people writing in to say that they're looking forward to the exercise I promised last month. Well here it is.
And don't knock it because it's simple. I use this every other day with my clients.
Find somewhere comfortable and quiet, where you're not going to be disturbed for five minutes. Then remember a time when you were really happy, excited and everything was going right.
Go on, you'll have a lot of them. But, as we said last month, we've trained our minds to notice the negatives. The positives, however, are in there somewhere.
We're going to tag a discrete physical movement - touching forefinger and thumb together - that you don't normally do, to a positive feeling.
This movement or Anchor, as it's called, will be a signal to your brain to remember that happy time. Now you can't feel happy and depressed at the same time, can you? Choose your Anchor now.
What I want you to do now is to go back into the memory and bring it alive. You'll be doing this with your imagination, so don't worry about whether the details are correct or not.
Step 1: Focus on what you can see: Who else is there? Are you inside or outside? What colours can you see? Have a look round.
Step 2: Now focus on what you can hear. What sounds are there? Which direction are they coming from? Are they loud or quiet? Near or far away?
Step 3: Focus on what you're feeling, specifically on how your body feels. Is it light or heavy? Bubbly or calm? What physical sensations do you have? Then how does your mind feel? Excited, confident, calm?
Step 4: Repeat steps 1 to3, but this time pick out the colours and make them brighter; turn up the volume on the sounds, make them louder; and increase the feelings of excitement or calmness and heaviness or lightness.
Step 5: Carry on building it up the positive experience and then at its peak "fire your Anchor", make that unusual movement.
Step 6: Repeat step 5 two or three times.
Whenever you feel low from now on "fire the anchor" every time.
The result is that you've hardwired your brain for happiness at the press of a trigger. The absolute key is to keep doing it.
Let me know how you've got on at: life@winningminds. co.uk
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